The Most Annoying Phrases In The English Language

I’ve gone over before that I HATE platitudes. This is for several reasons, including how they are not at all helpful, in the slightest, when I hear them. But, with that said, some of them are so egregious, some phrases and common sayings so irritating, that I felt the need to bitch about them on the internet.

 “You can do it!”

Okay, so, being supportive is nice, and good, and all that is swell—but clichés are clichés. Statements and sentences that come straight out of a hokey anime, or child-friendly animated movie, infuriate me because I feel like I am getting a robot quoting a film.

“I’m sure you’ll find someone.”

I do not talk about my relationship issues on this website. Just haven’t. I once wrote a long, detailed post on my opinions regarding romantic matters, but it seemed like something I should not wantonly jettison into the world—so it sits on my hard drive unused. Maybe I will release it one day, but, in the meantime, I hear this one so often it drives me insane. It not only fails to make me feel better, it also sounds condescending. “Oh, don’t worry, the universe will decide to give you love, one day. I’m sure.”

 “Art is subjective.”

Oh boy, is that a can of worms that needs its own article. Let me put it simply: anyone, for any reason, can enjoy a movie, or book, or anything, for any number of reasons. Obviously, there is a subjective aspect to art—and I will not claim otherwise. You can like something even if others do not.

However.

Objectively, some art is better than other art.

For instance, the craft of filmmaking is a somewhat codified medium, and doing certain things is always bad. Again, I need a much longer article to cover this, but the blanket statements that when it comes to movies or books or music, etc., critics are always wrong, and have no idea what they are talking about, drives me batty.

That’s not to say some critics aren’t assholes. They can be. But, like, if there’s no agreed upon metric for judging art, then how could anyone improve, ever?

“Think positively.”

Defeatism is not helpful in solving a problem; pushing yourself is an important part of being human. I mean, don’t just think the world is shit and then fail to live. But being able to anticipate problems (thinking with negative outcomes) is an important life skill, and assuming all will turn out okay is not a great method of survival. I suppose the reason this one bothers me so much is I point out the likely bad outcome (often avoidable) to someone, and they assume I’m only being negative. Then later, behold, it turns out I was right. This happens just enough to make me annoyed.

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Now, obviously, I am not mad, really, at the people who say these phrases. More so, I am pissed at the logic behind the assertions. I don’t expect people to think deeply about generic statements—most are not as much of a pedant and sourpuss as I—but that does not stop me from having trouble hearing the same echoing phrase across many faces.

Special thanks to: Bob GerkinCollin PearmanDylan AlexanderJerry Banfield, and Michael The Comic Nerd. 

Did you like the article? Dislike? Tell me about it in the comments. I would love to hear your opinions! If interested in specific articles, or want to write as a guest, you can message me at scifibrandonscott@gmail.com. If you want to help keep this blog going, consider becoming my patron at https://www.patreon.com/coolerbs. Thanks for reading!

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