I’d like to think that I’m a fairly smart person who is capable of solving issues with a cool and calm demeanor. I’d like to think that, but, that does not account for when I’m faced with a technology problem.

For you see, I’m a person who loves his gizmos and gadgets and methods of making things do cool stuff. If I don’t know something, I acquire my phone and search it online. If I don’t have something and I need it, I order it online. And, if I can, I like to automate things for myself so that it frees up mental space.

The only problem is, as I’m sure many will be familiar with, sometimes technology flat refuses to work. And, when that happens, something sparks in my brain. I must solve it. I take it as a personal attack on my being and will throw hours at the problem until it’s handled.

What’s funniest about this is it’s often for the sake of automation. I end up doing tremendous amounts of labor to save myself labor down the road. I once got angry, really truly angry, at a smart lightbulb. I’ve repeatedly reset a smart plug for two hours, not once willing to accept that I could not fix it. We’re talking aggressive practical application of the scientific method, but only ever to consumer grade electronics.

It’s a hell of a first-world problem. And, perhaps you could count it as a simple act of procrastination—a common affliction among the writing inclined—but, I consider it a combination of a misfiring of a strong work ethic and the kind of laziness that involves creating a robot just so it can do chores.

What’s even funnier is the only other time I get like this is when I’m working on a book. A classic case of not eating, sleeping, or using the bathroom for very long periods of time for the sake of something.

I’ll fully admit, though, it’s also just a lot of fun. There’s joy in completing a task after toiling on it.

I maybe should just try to use that energy for more productive things.

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Special thanks to: Bob Gerkin, Collin Pearman, Dylan Alexander, Jerry Banfield, and Michael The Comic Nerd. 

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